Tuesday, September 09, 2003

Nicotrol For Right Wing Blog Addicts

As a public service, we here at VeryVeryHappy are proud to offer the following generic entries to several popular Right wing blogs to stave off whatever twisted cravings you might have to read the real things.

InstaPundit:

HERE'S AN INTERESTING POST by a guy named Steve from Des Moines. He highlights the direct connection between the modern Democratic Party and the National Socialist German Workers Party. Some incriminating stuff here. Of course, you wouldn't know this if you only watched CNN...

posted at 05:43 PM by Glenn Reynolds

THE NEW YORK TIMES IS FULL OF SHIT because they quote unreliable sources and make things up.

posted at 05:17 PM by Glenn Reynolds

James Lileks:

Gnat was adorable today. I know that's a standard dad thing to say (average in the way that a gray tabby cat is average - familiar, but still aggressively likable. "Like me! Purr! Hiss!"), but it's true.

"Why can leprechauns get to end of the rainbow but we can't?" she asked with an impertinent grin.

The sheer cuteness of it floored me.

And you know what? I couldn't help but be reminded - by this precocious little girl who still doesn't know what wonders and complexities await her in this world - of why the Democrats are traitors and the Left seeks to destroy all that is beautiful.

I don't know, Gnat, I don't know. Let's find out together.


Andrew Sullivan:

IT LOOKS LIKE I WAS RIGHT: The only people blown up today are foreigners. America's shores are safe for you and me. George Bush is a genius.

EMAIL OF THE DAY: "As a proud member of the Communist Party, I have to say, the madness needs to stop!

I would describe myself as very liberal. I support nationalization of industry (without compensation), mandatory taxes ranging from 60-97% of all income, and the rehabilitation of endangered species by feeding them aborted fetuses. I also believe that war is wrong, and no person should ever do violence to another, for any reason.

I still believe strongly in most of those things, but the terrible tragedy that struck our nation two years ago has made me realize that I was wrong about war. The incredible leadership of President Bush during this time of crisis has opened my eyes.

It is with these stances in mind that I say: The Democratic presidential candidates are way too far Left for me!

I cannot describe to you how turned off I am by the disgusting, repetitive nature of their anti-Bush rhetoric. I can't say I agree with everything the President does, but he has proven himself to be courageous and strong in the face of the worst crisis ever to face our nation. He does not deserve the vile things that these nine nobodies are saying about him.

This, combined with their poilicy positions (which are so liberal they scare me!), forces me to conclude that none of them deserves the nomination. Unfortunately, one of them will get it.

And therefore I will be proud to vote for George W. Bush in November 2004.

P.S. - I am not Andrew Sullivan pretending to be an emailer.

P.P.S. - Really."

SONTAG AWARD NOMINEE: Dan Rather did tonight's newscast without a flag pin on his lapel. Pretty convincing proof that Bernie Goldberg was right. Bias indeed. But I'm sure Eric Alterman can come up with a nice-sounding excuse about how this has no bearing on his ludicrous "What Liberal Media" thesis. We're waiting, Eric.

- 2:47:23 PM

Little Green Footballs:

We must fight anti-Semitic tendencies wherever we may find them, for we must never forget the horrors of the Holocaust.

We must also kill all suspicious-looking Muslims.

Now quit taking my words out of context.

posted by Charles at 3:44 PM PST

The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler:

I am so fucking enraged I think my head is going to explode!!!

For any of you asshated illiberal moonbat fucknozzles that are reading this, here are The RulesTM that Loyal Citizens (REAL Americans to you, you bedwetting shiteating fuckwits) live by:

If some dried-up Commie sympathizing whore from the Irritating Retarded Shitdogs (I.R.S.) tells you that they haven't stolen enough of your money, you shoot her, because she's a cunt.

If you are in the Gestapo city of Chicago and one of Mayor Fucktard Daley's SS troopers pulls you over and gives you a ticket, you shoot them, because Nazi scumfuckers deserve to be Horrendously Hollowed out by HollowpointsTM!

If I ever see a crowd of foolish felching fuckweasle hippies, there'd better be cops in between me and them, because otherwise I'd tear their fucking midget-dicks off and shove them down their putrid throats! Or I'd shoot them.

And never, ever include the letter "o" when spelling "G-d", because that's a sin.

Posted by Emperor Misha I at 03:27 AM

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