Monday, June 02, 2003

The Love That Dare Not Speak Its Name

I know that by writing this, I am going to piss off everyone who agrees with me about anything (except, perhaps, TBogg), but I just saw Peggy Noonan live on TV for the first time (until today, I've only seen photographs and read her writing), and I'm sorry, but subtract fifteen years to make the age difference palatable, and she'd be pretty hot.

My God, you are saying to yourself, Christian has lost his mind. He has finally gone over to the Dark Side, seduced like one of those little pervert Tory boys in the eighties who fantasized about paddlings and Maggie Thatcher.

Ho ho. Not so fast. I simply state that the lady has nicely-shaped eyes, a pretty smile, and decent cheekbones. I said nothing about personality or ideology.

In fact, I now know exactly why whenever Noonan is mentioned, someone inevitably makes a crack about Peggy being off her meds and out of the padded room. Through her entire back and forth with Chris Matthews, I counted five separate times when I was almost certain she was about to break down. Not that she seemed excessively emotional, but the way her voice quavers when she tries to make a point, and the unpredictable on-off-on-off of her smile makes me very definitely uncomfortable.

So, I guess my question is...

Is her problem genetic, or perhaps the result of coming of age with a flawed ideology among characters of questionable sincerity and negligible ethics?

And if it's the latter, does she have a daughter? Perhaps one that's been raised by normal people? Or, failing that, wolves?

If so, someone pass her along my URL, eh? Think about it; Peggy's daughter and I- talking, meeting, falling in love. And someday, Peggy as my mother-in-law!

Oh what fun,
Oh what fun,
Oh what fun indeed.

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